MY SPEAKING PLATFORM.

Dearest future,  i can't help but to write you this letter, i just want to report my past and my present and all they have done to me, so that you can treat me differently and nicely when you come. My past and my present  have not been entirely great, at some point, i laud their efforts, there were times when in my past i cried every night on my bed, soaking my pillow because of pain, but my present sent me time, and it is healing every wound. There were times i was confused, not even knowing what you hold. Afraid to look into you, and when i did, you were too dark to see through, it only made me more confused. There were times  in my past i didn't realise how much of a gift waking up everyday was, i just lived my life as the day comes. My present has thought me that there is more to sleeping and waking up and more to the sky than just it's blue, black, and white. I am learning well. There were times i didn't know the difference between right and wrong, everythi...

It was unlike her, if there was anything Ruth wore better than a makeup, it was a smile. A smile that never fades, a smile-provoking smile. I mean Ruth can make you smile just by smiling at you. Her smiles were that contagious, it made her attractive. Her smile was like a magnet. It could search, deep, through the saddest of souls and draw out it purest smile. If she was happy, it reflected on her face and touched her eyes. She was a smiley like that. So everyone thought she was okay, as in,"she dey eat belle full " and we thought "ah! I dont need to ask you if you are okay, your smiles tells it all". I remember spreading my lips with my fingers in front of my mirror severally, practicing how to smile like her. She brought her sheen and shine, and injected it into every heart. It was not until the blood-chilling news of her death came, which left everybody numb, did we know that a smile can be a catchy and deceptive Sham. What could have made Ruth thought of suicide...

The door opens and with a bang it closes, she enters, panting and pacing like someone who just escapes an attack from a dangerous beast. " Yes i did it, it wasn't that difficult, it felt good, i will do it all over again if given a chance". She said. She continues to pace back and forth oblivious of my presence. I sat on the bed mute, not knowing what to say, not knowing if welcome or are you okay? Is right to say at the moment. She continues her monologue. " I thought myself a victim and gave him a knife. I thought if he knew past my skin, my words, my face, he won't like me that very much, i wanted him to love me, not for my tears or fears because i am so much more than past tense emotions. So many times i have held my tongue, afraid, afraid to say the little i think, afraid to say he was wrong, to say i am tired, to say the words, and so he had my consent since silence meant that. Hahaha! Daily he thought himself to be a conqueror, a conqueror that i have b...